The worst type of nightmare is to wake up from it realising that its actually the reality.
Welcome to my world.
My fever subsided a few days ago is now back with vengence. Together with the dry cough, I can hardly function properly already.
Then last night my sister brought her bf home to stay over again. I told her I have nothing against them being together or what. And I have nothing against him wanting to hang out at our place. But she's been bringing him home to stay for a few days already. I thought after past incidents she would be more sensitive to my feelings and that she'll take the initiative to avoid any direct clashes. But boy, I was wrong.
Actually I knew that he had been staying over on and off. I just turned a blind eye because I trust her to know what she's doing and that she would at least try to avoid hurting me. I told her I'm really uncomfortable with him around. I mean I can't go bra-less, and whenever I walk into our room, I'll worry that I might interupt them while they're intimate or what-so-ever. After my sms, she just got changed and left the house with him.
Was that an outright protest? That I have to turn a blind eye and tolerate if I want her to stay at home? Like what others at home are doing? Or is everyone too indifferent to do anything aboout it? I mean its a known fact that my family had fallen apart. No one seemed to care about anything.
All these had caused me a great deal of distress, and why does everyone under-estimate how much I've been affected by it? Its haunting me every minute, every second. Yes I do seemed cheery on the outside, but I'm totally devastated inside. I can't just IGNORE her or IGNORE them. Because I just can't. Because they all mean so much to me I just can't understand why they are doing what they are doing.
I just want to pack my bags and leave.
I believe I can.
